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About ritaA twenty something year old British/Libyan based in Istanbul, Turkey. |
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About ritaA twenty something year old British/Libyan based in Istanbul, Turkey. |
It's the first time,
He smiles at me. It's the first time, He picks me up for a date. It's the first time I feel this way about someone, Every little thing he does for me warms my heart. It's the first time that I truly let my guard down. It's the first time someone made me feel like I was the most important thing in the world. What an amazing feelings. It's the first time that I want to give more than take, Because his happiness is what makes me happy. My biggest fear though Is losing him. It's the first time I feel like maybe... Just maybe, we could be together forever. But time passes... and all the firsts... Become seconds... and thirds... I start losing count... And I let all the things I once found beautiful, fade away. And then slowly... but suddenly, It's time to realize that the person who can make me the happiest, is also the one who can cause me most pain. I trust him not to let go. He promised to never leave me. It's the first time I know what it's like. To be heartbroken. It's the first time I feel like this Completely helpless... Like I'm reaching for something, But it just slips away right through my fingers. And just because he doesn't love me the same way I do, doesn't mean he does not love me. That's the only excuse I have to make myself happy. Satisfied. Because I can't go a day without thinking about him. To be continued Z.A
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Rita A AtiahArchives
October 2018
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